The source of stress has shifted

Today is a day of doubt for me.

After I started crunching my numbers again a few weeks ago, I now feel that a part of my plan is eroding. Specifically, I currently assume that my side gig will provide a significant amount of money for at least 10 years after I pull the plug.

Ironically, this assumption, and the side gig itself, have now become a source of stress, bigger than my 9 to 5.

I’m not really sure how I cornered myself into that situation, but this is where I am today.I guess something that was “nice, additional money on the side” was ok, but it becomes less ok once it becomes a compulsory part of the plan.

I won’t go into details but recently all my attempts to maintain that side gig at its current income levels (let alone grow it!) have met strong obstacles. Some of them are technical and can be solved with hard work (which, for a while, I’ve been too lazy to address), some of them are just human nature and I can’t fix them. Again, I won’t go into details, but a certain chain of events had me questioning the side gig in its entirety this week.

I’ve gone through multiple issues with my side gig before, but this particular one has been going on for months and culminated this week. It also doesn’t look like it wants to go away. The net result for me is that the side gig currently generates a huge amount of stress, while it makes ridiculously low amounts of income compared to what I make with my 9 to 5. The stress has reached a point where it is financially not really worth it.

I still badly want to pull the plug on my 9 to 5, I really do. But the math tells me that I’d either have to maintain my side gig’s income for at least 10 years, OR I could stay at my job an additional 18 months (on top of the year I still need with my current plan) and not need the side gig.

Not so long ago, I would have said this wasn’t even a question. Today I’m not so sure.

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